Faith: One’s relationship with spiritual being (God)
Finance: One’s needs and lacks; The Issue of money
Family: One’s relationship with people, family, friends, and well wishers
However, we will be dealing with the last ‘F’ which is Family. Marriage to be precise. Virtually every one of us has an idea of what marriage means. Union of two people that have mutually agreed to spend the rest of their life’s together
I will be giving just 3 keys that ruin marriage. Before we talk about love
1. Faulty Foundation issue
2. Charisma at the expense of character
3. Incompatibility of purpose discovered and fulfilling partners
1. Faulty foundation issue: Everything is sustained by it’s source. Imagine, taking fish out of the water what happens to it?
How about when plant is uprooted from the ground? Everything is sustained by its source.
When God was creating the fish, He said the water should bring forth fishes, And it did, any day you take fish from its source, the things only struggles and dies off. And to plant, he said, let the ground bring out herbs. When you uproot plants from the ground, it struggles a while and dies naturally. And to man, God said let us make man in our image and likeness. Meaning men came from a source called God, when a man detaches himself from God, he struggles and eventually dies off. In other words, my point of emphasis is that God himself, instituted marriage, he is the source, so marriage can only be sustained by its source. Why we have so many struggles and divorce in marriage is because the source has been neglected.
In you consider the word Race, Put G in front of it, It becomes G-race.
The G-factor in marriage
Still laying foundation.
When a universal principle is broken, It comes with penalties. The source of marriage gave man kind a universal principle, not to defy ourselves until after marriage. Now what happens, when this principle is broken? This leads to cheating (Unfaithfulness) and infidelity
Cheating is when you have tasted different soups and eating just one soup becomes so difficult. Because we have had a taste of egusi, ogbono, vegetable soup, idikanko soup and so on. When we finally marry, we find it so difficult eating just egusi soup for the rest of our life and thus leads to cheating and in turn leads to broken home and failure in marriage.
Secondly, Infidelity, financial issues and addiction.
Now, we have STD ‘Sexual transmitted Disease’ ‘Sexual transmitted Demons’
Sex is beyond physical things. Now, when we have sex, we go into spiritual oneness with the other person. And if there are any spiritual or ancestral curses following the other partner automatically you become a carrier spiritually. Some men are suffering today because of this.
Consequences for breaking universal principle; It ought to be marriage before sex and never the reverse. In building a house, once the foundation is faulty, the building will hardly last. This is same with marriage; Once our foundation is faulty, sustainability becomes difficult. The high rate of broken marriage can be traced to this.
2. Charisma at the expense of character
Charisma is once personal quality to attract or impress others. One beauty, eloquent speaking, angelic voice, Envying height, Handsome guy, no pimples, All these are charisma… It will only attract and impress others, But character is the real you in expression. Igbo adage said, Character is the beauty of a woman. Charisma might bring you inside the house, but it will take character to keep you. Charisma is like a make-up face, just give it time the real face will be seen. Character is your real face; No pretense; No impression; No lying.
For many of us, as little as am sorry is so difficult for us to say. As little as thank you. We find difficult it to say
Pride and arrogance won’t let us see the faults in our words. Little positive responds to things done or said to us is what builds our character. I call this point *The U-Factor* Because its all about you and your choice to respond to external stimulus. The first point is the *G-Factor* Take time to build your character rather than fixing nails and eye.
Take time to discipline your talking capacity. Diarrhea in the mouth is not too good for a Prospective wife or husband. Work on your anger problem. Sure it has a cure. Negative attitude or character will never make our marriage a Paradise.
Thirdly and the last one point….
*Compatibility of purpose discovered and fulfilling partners. Don’t marry a man who doesn’t know where he is going in life. Don’t marry when you have not discovered the essence of your living.
Number one purpose of marriage is to help each other fulfill their individual destinies. You cannot be in a ship with someone going North whereas you are passionate to go south, it won’t work. Now, there are serious issues in marriage when each other have not discovered who and why they are. When, the two partners have discovered their purpose, living becomes meaningful
*Apart from sex, give children. Something stronger needs to give you reasons to wake up next morning, and waking up next morning to see the very person helping you in achieving your dreams and purpose is enough reasons to fall in love a million times every morning*
There will not be time for unnecessary argument. Because the two of you are consumed with fulfilling your purpose or dreams. No time to look outside or cheat;
No time to hear *I hear say*; No time to gossip your sweetheart to your friends. Meaning for living becomes afresh every morning. And it will become heaven on earth.
In Conclusion, 1. The G-Factor in the race, Don’t annoy God before your marriage
Don’t eat the fruit when is not ripe
Don’t drink the tea when it is still too hot
Don’t touch the fire when is not time, It will burn you.
2. Character keeps u in the house
3. Know who you are created to be and find someone help you in fulfilling your purpose. Like Pastor Peter Ayo-Alabi used to say, “You don’t have a life and you are saying you want a life partner”
Is there any remedy once the fruit is being eaten unripe?
Answer: In the days of ignorance God over looked, but now you know, He won’t be happy with you. Mercy will prevent the unripe fruit’s acid from condemning your lips. But if you go on, The consequences is right in your hands.
Is it advisable for a Man/Guy to fall in love with a woman who has a child from another man, who still is alive but is not ready to accept his responsibilities (the Woman and Child) at least for that time Frame.
Answer: The woman in question, if she is married to her husband, pls leave her alone and make your love fall on another damsel
Note: We don’t fall in love, why? Anything that falls gets broken. If you doubt me ask ceramic plates, rather we grow in love.
FACILITATOR: Nwafor Dan
COMPILED BY: Valuex Information Management Department